If I’m a lot… go find less
I had nothing left to say … so all I could do was cry.
Eddie stayed strong for both of us, and reserved his emotions as best he could. We hugged each other so tight, and I got in my car.
I drove away and watched Eddie waving to me through the rear view mirror. My painful tears that night were pivotal and were also an intuition. I remember feeling like that would be the last time I ever saw Eddie. I was closing a chapter without having said it. I trusted my body, my overwhelming tears, and my pain surging through every inch of my being. I understood what had just occurred.
That night I barely slept a wink. I was moving to Paris tomorrow, and I kept repeating this fact over and over again in my thoughts. I had a one-way ticket and was going to land in France and have to adjust and “make it work.”
No turning back. I think I went through every emotion in the book. Suddenly, my alarm clock started to buzz. I jumped out of bed, showered and put on my jeans and striped navy and white t-shirt. I was going to be French in all ways from appearance, to lifestyle, and hopefully speaking the language.
After more tearful goodbyes with my mom, dad and Simba, I was in the airport all checked in and ready to board my flight to dream land. I thought about what I would do for my first couple of days in Paris…
I had rented a stunning one bedroom apartment complete with a full kitchen and balcony. I would be staying there for the first three weeks until my attic near the Pantheon was available. I envisioned daily walks through the Luxembourg Gardens, sitting at a café for two hours feasting on Chevre Chaud Salade and Duck Confit, strolling the open-air markets and retreating into a museum in the late afternoons. I would spend the first several weeks taking it all in, and then school would commence and I would be on my way to being a wine expert.
My last emotion as I boarded my flight to Paris and flew out of California was pure excitement. I am so lucky.
I remember this moment vividly ! I was so excited for you but anxious and sad at the same time ! My free spirit daughter was starting a new adventure!
I know Mom … I remember it so well, like it was yesterday! An adventure it was!
I have loved every single excerpt you’ve published and cannot wait to read your book. You can tell you’ve really poured your heart into it. Well done!
Awww THANK YOU Stephanie! So glad you are enjoying them … the book takes it up another level 🙂 I simply can’t wait for it to be published.
Thanks again for you support!